Expectations vs. Understanding

This past week I ran into a difficult customer. After working with the fellow for over a year and a half (not personally, but I have been part of the car deal all along) there was a misunderstanding. We finally found the last vehicle in the country that met his needs, flew a great distance to pick it up, and made literally nothing on the car deal. We were in fact, just trying to get another number on the board towards our objective. After all that, as the customer came out to see the vehicle, something happened. We still aren't sure what happened exactly. But after all that effort, he felt that we weren't trusting of him and he decided that this wasn't going to be his car. I've been there before. In fact I know we all have. So I just pleaded with him, and begged him to reconsider. It was to no avail. HE said that we were just done. I told him that I would earnestly pray about the situation. I prayed that the situation would be resolved, either way. And that I would understand the overall plan.

The next day, his old truck would not start. He was stranded at home. HE called the salesman, and asked if we could come pick him up. We gladly obliged.

Today, a vendor came in that normally shares her faith with us. I began to tell her the story about what happened. She really enjoyed the story, and told me about the prayer of Jabez. I did in fact already know about that prayer, but I told her that I disagreed with her. I don't want to step on any toes, but I know a few people that pray that prayer. I'm not saying that it is wrong to pray that, but I have seen it take a somewhat mutated existence. In the context of what happened to me, I wasn't praying that the customer would in fact take the vehicle in question, thereby "increasing my territory." I prayed that I would understand why the decision was made, either way. The prayer of Jabez speaks of enlarging one's territory. And that's where the mix up often occurs. Many people that I speak with refer to the prayer as a way to gain favor for material gain. By "enlarging one's territory," it means make them more spirtitually responsible, not to get more stuff. If I pray for material gain, I feel that I am wasting my time with the Lord. I should spend that time praising him, and asking for help with more important matters. Material gain, to me, is a byproduct of doing what is expected of me as a Christian. I asked for understanding, as opposed to the sale. Because I could have forced the sale, and lost so much more. Who knows, maybe we would have sold the vehicle to a family in need. It just so happens that the vehicle in question was intended for the fellow in the story. Maybe I had to do some maturing over night. Maybe he had a tough decision to make that evening. Or maybe this is the whole reason I'm writing this little blurb. The point I am trying to make is that the prayer of Jabez is a good prayer. Just be careful, and think about what you're praying for. Instead, try to pray for understanding, that way, you will never be let down.

Rant: I don't ignore orders.

I have a special ability. Maybe it's the only one. Evidently, it is. When I am tasked with a request, I can, in a split second, analyze the entire situation, see what is required, and make an assesment of the situation immediately. My downfall, however, is that I take these tasks asked of me to heart. In other words, I take it personally when called a failure.

I was tasked with doing two things over the past two days. Nothing big, just things that needed to be done. Well, I have been in charge of doing these things in the past. So, I was able to determine the amount of man power, compare that to what we had available, add to that the amount of time required, make sure customers would be waited on, and make sure it was done speedily and to perfection. Both things were asked of me the at closing the evening before I had scheduled them to be done. I assessed the situation, gathered the required information, made a judgement call, scheduled the work to be done, and guess what? I was called defiant, lazy, and essentially irresponsible. I'm sorry, but I would rather not lie and tell someone it will be done immediately, when it will done at the next possible time. I would rather be up front (as asked) and make it clear, that it would be taken care of when the necessary resources are available. Now, if we were talking about the request being filled days, or even weeks later, I would understand the anger directed at me. When it's minutes, not even hours are separating the job from completion, I have a hard time taking that. When criticized, I take it to heart. Especially in front of an audience.

This was funny. Then it became very sad.

TopGear is a wonderful British automotive show that tests cars, and has fun doing it. Save for their typical attitude that "all that is not British is crap" approach, it is very enjoyable. One feature I rather enjoy is their TopGear Challenge. Basically, they but a cheap car (think $1000 or so), and then have to complete a race with some quirky challenge thrown in. It's not so much a race as it is a competitive Sunday drive. Most of the cars they buy are barely road worthy.

In this specimen, they took three typical American cars, an IROC Camaro, a Dodge pickup, and a Cadillac. The challenge was to drive across Alabama. Easy enough. The quirky part was that they had to do it without getting shot or pulled over. Easy enough, still. Each opponent was asked to paint an offending phrase on the other opponent's car. Well, that proved to be the problem. The Cadillac had "Hillary for President" and "NASCAR SUCKS" written on it. The Camaro had "Country Western is Rubbish" written on it. The pickup had "Man Love Rules" written on it. They may be offensive to some, but as I watched the video, I saw the ugly side of humanity (not necessarily America) rise up. The trip was uneventful on the highway, save for a few dirty looks, "the fingers," and some horn honking. It was when the stopped off for some "petrol" that things got ugly...

The station manager comes out with a raised voice making some unkind remarks. The hosts explain a little bit of what was going on. If that weren't tasteless enough, she hollers out, "I'm calling the boys!" A few minutes later a truck pulls up and these hooligans jump out and start throwing rocks at these guys. Earlier in the program, they made a comment about how the order of importance in America is George Bush, God, and Country &Western. The problem is he seems to be on the right path, at least with this group of people he came across. The problem is, if these people really were after God's heart, they could have tried to reach out to these "lost souls." They could have found out what their stories were. They could have offered them a helping hand.

The point is, that the act was seen, judgement was passed, and the sentence was almost carried out. I know I'm going a bit deep, after all, the same thing could happen in any part of the globe, which TopGear so conveniently left out. There is a parallel to our own hearts though that we should always be on guard against. So often, I have found myself judging others before I knew anything about them. Could you imagine what would happen if God, or Jesus, saw us doing something wrong in his eyes, and he just started pelting us with stones? Or worse? Fortunately, we have the love and compassion of Christ, so that we may be forgiven, corrected, and allowed to enter the kingdom in heaven.

So next time you see a car driving down the road, with offending phrases painted on it, or see a somebody doing "wrong," stop and think about what is going on. If you are in a position to help, offer assistance. If you are really bothered, say a little prayer for them. And for goodness sake, look for the film crew on the other side of the road!

Rant: Dis-connect

It's amazing how when people get use to a certain life style, they sometimes forget what it was like before. Sara and I have made certain choices that limit our income dramatically. Firstly, I will say that we are blessed beyond measure. We have been able to maintain a wonderfully full lifestyle. But, we made the conscience decision to allow Sara to stay home to take care of R3. Sara is a wonderful mother, and we did not want R3 (and possibly another) to go to a school were we essentially let "someone else" raise our child. We made a promise to the Lord that we would raise him to love him and his laws. R3 has a great gig going. He watches Bob the Builder, Thomas the Tank Engine, Cars, and etc. He has play time. We have a whole mess of Thomas the Tank Engine tracks, cars, stations, etc. In other words, he has everything a little boy would want. I make an effort to put him to bed every night, and read him a Bible story. We run a strict house hold, but also one of love, forgiveness, and fun. In other words, we have put our efforts into building a good life for R3, instead of trying to amass earthly wealth. He is comfortable. He is not ignored. Most importantly, he is loved. I'm not saying this can't be done if my wife had a job, but it would not be as consistent. Financially, we shouldn't have all that we do. God, like I said earlier, has blessed us beyond measure. Our ship runs like a well oiled machine. We just don't have the money to blow on "luxury items." Items like computers, cars, boats, and trips. Sometimes, I feel like people just don't understand our situation. I will, by no means, say we are poor. We just don't have much extra cash. What we spend, we spend on things that can be seen as an investment of sorts. People that know me, know that I always have a project I'm working on. For instance, we just finished our home theater. I love getting up in the attic and doing the manual labor. Running wires, measuring, cutting, and so forth. In fact, the way I did our last house was quite unique. So unique in fact, it help sell the house for more than it should have. In other words, we spend money in a way that it will eventually come back somehow. Some day, I hope to take our family on big vacations. I promised Sara to take her to Greece or Europe someday. I also promised my Asian family I would be back to visit them as well. With any luck, R3 could go, and I can show him the wonders of Japan. We just don't have the ability to do that stuff right now, however. And you know what? I don't care. I'm investing in R3's future. When R3 grows up, he will be well adjusted, he'll look back on a family that loved him no matter what, and he will have a history of no regrets. I may shelter him some, but I want him to experience everything the world has to offer. Getting back on topic. There are many things that Sara and I don't have the "luxury" of doing/owning/enjoying. And it bugs me when people expect me to have that ability. Sometimes it seems that people are sometimes even put-off or completely lost by our "inability" to do these things. I have made my choice of lifestyle, and instead of having that fleeting excitement of doing/owninig/enjoying something, I have the comfort of knowing that R3 will have the best childhood I could give.

This is our inspiration: Titus 2: 11-14

For the grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. 12It teaches us to say "No" to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope—the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good.

This verse has hung over his bed since we dedicated him to God.